1.“No, I am not single. I am in a long distance relationship because my boyfriend lives in the future.”
2.It is not love that makes a relationship complicated; it’s the people in it who do.
3.You add meaning to my life and yet, you subtract some cash from my wallet.
4.If love is a blunder, then it means that the biggest fault in my life is loving you.
5.Loss for words? Give that person a hug. It’s worth a thousand and more. Plus, it’s free.
6.A person in love partly becomes a poet, a composer and the corniest person in the room.
7.When people ask me what is more important, food or love, I don’t answer because I’m eating.
8.To fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful.
9.“I promise I’ll never be a high maintenance girlfriend as long as you promisenever to be a dud of a boyfriend.”
10.“My love for you is like a fart that can’t be contained. Bursting out aloud in all its glory and fragrance.”
11.According to Newton’s Law of love, love can neither be created nor destroyed. However, it can create a girlfriend who can destroy wallets.
12.A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
13.Love is like a tornado, picks you up off your feet and sometimes takes half your house.
14.“Everyday I fall in love with you more and more. Except yesterday, yesterday you were pretty annoying.”
15.You will always be my 11:11 and the name I write in my naughty list.
16.“I promise to love you, respect you, support you, and above all else, make sure I’m not just yelling at you because I’m hungry.”
17.“Our relationship is based on twosimple rules. Number one, you do everything I say. Numbertwo, never forget number one.”
18.During my days, the teenagers talk about movies, music and love. Now, all the kids talk about are sex, relationship and heartbreak.
19.I wish there’s a traffic light to tell me when to stop, go and slow down when I took this road of falling in love.
20.Stop waiting for your prince in a white horse. Go and find him. The poor bastard might be lost, stuck in an island or something.
21.Love is telling someone that his zipper is open or her wig looks too fake.
22.Girls cry their eyes out until they are dry, while boys drink their beers until their mugs are all dried up.
23.I want to be your sweet good morning, your lovely good night and your most painful goodbye.
24.“I know why you work out every day. You want to look as hot as me, don’t you?”
25.You’ll know a person is in love when he can laugh like a fool by himself and keeps a goofy smile plastered on his face all day long.
26.When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner.
27.“He is my joy, my piece, and handbag because I love holding his hand wherever we go. I can’t risk the chance of making those smart boyfriend snatchers to snatch my one and only handbag away.”
28.Promise yourself not to be a woman who needs a man to live, but a woman a man needs.
29.“I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole.”
30.“Our relationship issimple. You do what I say, and I say what you have to do.”
31.Staying in love for more than 5 years is almost impossible. Staying in love with the same person for you’re the rest of your life is a miracle.
32.They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?
33.“I love you like how potbellied policemen are obsessed with donuts and how chubby kids love ice cream.”
34.“Never, ever forget that an angry girlfriend is a car without gas. You’ll keep paying the loan payments and it’ll take up space in your garage, but it ain’t going nowhere.”
35.“I love you. You annoy me more than I ever thought possible. But I want to spend every irritating minute with you.”
36.You’re the cheese on top of my spaghetti, the cream on top of my frappuccino and the cheesecake on my red velvet cake.
37.Don’t feel bad if you see your ex with someone else. Remember, our parents taught us to give the things we don’t need to the less fortunate.
38.“I love you so much I’dfight abear for you. Well not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because theyknow Kung Fu… But a care bear, I’d definitely fight a care bear for you.”
39.“When it comes to our relationship, I want you to be stress-free all the time. Just keep calm and do as I say.”
40.“Please baby, I am scared and want you to come back home quickly so you can kill this cockroach for me. I can’t stay in the room until you are backbaby. You know I love you with all my heart!”
41.Love is like a headache or a backache. It does not show in the MRI or X-ray, but you just know that it’s there.
42.Marriage does not only require you to deal with expenses and the toilet seat, you also have to deal with feelings and the last resort, the lawyers.
43.I love you so much I’d fight a bear for you. Well not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because they know Kung Fu. But a care bear, I’d definitely fight a care bear for you.
44.“Sometimes I wonder how you put up with me. Then I remember, oh I put up with you too. So we’re even.”
45.You are the pain in my butt, the dent in my wallet and the scratches in my brand new car that I don’t mind.
46.“You stole my heart so I’m planning revenge… I am going to take your last name.”
47.I solemnly swear I am up to no good especially when I am all alone with you.
48.“I promise, I’ll never ever ask you to give me money. Except, when I go shopping.”
49.“Grow old with me. Let’s count each other’s wrinkles as the years pass by. Let’s see who losses all of the teeth and who will need the help of the walking stick first.”
50.I want to be the reason when you look down on your phone, you’ll have this goofy smile in your face and jump up and down like a silly little girl, and then fall down a manhole.
51.My mind works great wonder 365 days a year, 7 days a week and 24 hours a day until I met you.
52.This is as close as I can get to describing it – a hot pancake with butter melting on top and a steaming cup of coffee as soon as I open my eyes. That’s how wonderful it is to wake up knowing you are mine and I am yours.
53.“The first day I met you my heart almost jumped out of my body. I must confess that my temperature jumped from 6o degrees to 360 degrees. My Doctor was scared thinking that I am already a living dead until diagnosed me and found out your presence caused this to me!”
54.“The only way you can make me fall deeper in love with you is to buy an iPhone for me or give me or if you can hold me like phone and talk to me but remember, if you press the wrong button you will be disconnected. I love you!”
55.“If you want me to believe that you are truly in love with me, then buy me a private jet, go to the world bank and steal for me, slap the President for me to prove how much I mean to you-then I will be satisfied that truly you love me.”