1.“If I find any treasure, I’m going to use it to buy bananas for all the monkeys.”
2.“I want to be just like my daddy when I grow up, except for his hairy chest.”
3.“You’re getting wiser every year – and that’s bad news for the rest of us!”
4.“What do pirates say when they find a treasure chest?” They say: “me wanted, me wanted!”
5.“Keep your sense of humor, even if you have to keep it in a little jar on the shelf.”
6.May your day be filled with as much fun and laughter as you can handle.
7.“I want to be just like Mommy when I grow up, except for her weird taste in men.”
8.Happy birthday! I hope this is the beginning of a wonderful year full of hilarity and hijinks!
9.“I’m so glad I don’t have to dress up like a witch or a skeleton this year!”
10.“No matter how old you are, it’s never too late to dress up in a costume!”
11.“Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day; Teach him to fish and he’ll eat for the rest of his life.”
12.“I’m not saying you’re a witch, but you definitely have a wicked sense of humor!”
13.“I’m thankful for my big nose because it helps me smell food from far away.”
14.“Thanksgiving is a holiday where you are not asked to do anything for anyone, but you are still invited to the party.”
15.“It’s cool to have a cousin. I can go to them if I need to borrow something.”
16.“I’m thankful for my 2 front teeth because without them I wouldn’t be able to eat any candy.”
17.“Why did the turtle cross the road? Because he was feeling really sluggish that day.”
18.“Cousins are the only people who can make you feel like a million bucks, no matter what.”
19.“There are three things that will ensure a good night’s sleep for children: a binky, a teddy bear, and two soft puppies.”
20.“If you want to catch a monkey, you have to put on a banana suit.”
21.“It’s not about how hard you hit, it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving.”
22.“You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you might find, you get what you need.”
23.“My mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, ‘Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.’”
24.“I wish Christmas lasted all year long, so I could enjoy the holiday season even more!”
25.“Sleigh bells ring, are you listening? In your dreams, that is where Santa is glistening!”
26.“Santa doesn’t want you to be bored on your family’s Christmas Eve so he has left some activities for you.”
27.My cousin is so lazy, she would rather sit in bed and watch TV all day.
28.“Pirate Pete always said, ‘The only thing worse than being a pirate is being a pirate without an ear. And the only thing worse than that is not having an ear at all.’”